Adulting 

It’s crazy in life how you continue to change & morphe as an individual. It’s also crazy how the people that you call friends can take you by surprise in both good and bad ways. I think a lot of us nowadays call people friends without truly understanding the definition of what a friend is versus the definition of what an acquaintance is (we can thank social media for that).

Now technically we can get out a thesaurus & look up the definitions of both but I don’t have time for that plus I have to cite it LOL. 

You see an acquaintance is someone who you know that you may have shared some good times with but do not consider them a particularly good friend or close friend.

A friend is someone you keep in consistent contact with, try to spend as much time with,  someone that you are loyal to & someone you are there for when they need you. Also that needs to be reciprocated in order to be a true friendship in my opinion. It should always be a two-way street.

It blows my mind how I hold certain people in high regards, but then only to find out through their lack of actions that they do not feel the same about me. It also blows my mind that people that I have a shorter relationship with act as a true friend, and in recent times have offered more friendship to me than most of the others combined. 

Yes we grow up. Yes most of us make families. Yes most of us have jobs. Yes we become busy to the point where sometimes we don’t have extra time to spare. 

With that said, it’s not that hard to make your thumb send a text message (or respond back), or to pick the phone up and call someone just to tell them that they are important to you, or to keep your word when you tell somebody that you were going to make time for them.

Now am I perfect; absolutely not. I have made these mistakes, but I have also acknowledge them and worked hard to become the friend that I want my friends to be to me even after the recent demons that I’ve had to go through after having my child. And what’s funny is that no one was there when I was going through those hard times. If you’re truly friends with someone then you would notice that their behavior has changed in one way or another & that is when instead of distancing yourself from them you need to engage with them and be there for them when they need you the most. 

Friendship shouldn’t be a tit for a tat. However, as time goes by & you start adulting, you start analyzing your relationships with people & you start counting those tits for tats, because even though you shouldn’t have to, you realize that you have put way too much time and emotion into a relationship that could really care less about you or at least the actions say that. 

Action speak louder than words.

My point is that you need to choose your “friends” wisely, & learn the difference between a true friend and an acquaintance so that you don’t find yourself heartbroken when someone doesn’t categorize you the same as you have categorized them. It will save you a lot of heartache & stress.

Also remember that there’s nothing wrong with having acquaintances, you’re going to have way more of those in your life then you are going to have actual friends and that’s OK.

Love,

Jelly & Roo

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